Practices for Returning
Known
I am fully known by God and safely seen by others.
Most of us have spent years managing how much of ourselves we let others see. Being fully known can feel more threatening than comforting, especially if being seen has not always felt safe. This exercise invites you to let God's knowing land somewhere in your body, not as exposure, but as steady, kind attention.
01Arriving in the Body
Sit with both feet on the floor. Let your spine lengthen gently. Let your hands rest open on your thighs. Take a slow breath in through your nose. Long exhale through your mouth.
Now notice: the weight of your body in the chair, the feeling of your feet pressing into the ground, the temperature of the air on your skin.
Pray simply: “Lord, You are here.”
“Where can I go from Your Spirit? Even there Your hand shall lead me.”
Psalm 139
Let your nervous system register: You are not alone in this moment.
02Being Known by God
Place one hand over your heart. Notice your heartbeat. Notice any emotion present, without fixing it. Gently whisper: “You know me, Jesus.”
“O Lord, You have searched me and known me.”
Psalm 139:1
Let this move from theology to sensation. Ask yourself: What does it feel like in my body to be fully known? Is there tightness? Softness? Resistance? Take one slow breath into wherever you feel tension. Imagine God's knowing not as exposure, but as steady, kind attention.
03Being Seen Without Shame
Bring to mind one small, safe area of your life where you feel seen by another person. Notice what happens in your body as you remember that. Does your chest soften? Does your jaw unclench? Does your breathing deepen?
“The Lord God made garments and clothed them.”
Genesis 3:21
Even after Adam and Eve hid, God moved toward them. You are not known in order to be shamed. You are known in order to be covered in love. You are fully known and fully loved.
Breath prayer
Breathe in, I am fully known...
Breathe out, ...I am fully loved.
04Regulating Through Connection
Now imagine sitting across from Jesus. Not analyzing you. Not correcting you. Simply present. Notice: the expression on His face, the posture of His body, the tone in His eyes.
“Before I formed you, I knew you.”
Jeremiah 1:5
Let your body settle into that gaze. If anxiety rises, lengthen your exhale. The long exhale signals safety to your nervous system. Whisper: “I don't have to hide.”
05Extending Safe Presence to Others
Now bring your awareness back to your body. Feel your feet again. Feel the chair holding you. Ask yourself: If I know I am seen and safe with God, how might I become that safe presence for someone else?
“Encourage one another and build one another up.”
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Place both hands over your heart and pray: “Lord, root me in Your knowing love. Let me live unhidden. Make me a steady presence for others.”
Take one final slow breath. When you're ready, open your eyes.
A Personal Reflection
The topic of being known is one I still wrestle with, even after five years of a healing journey that God has been walking me through. There are times I sit with this exact exercise and feel genuine fear rise up in my body. And there are other times I can feel the safety of it settling in. God continues to use this prayer to bring new parts of my story into the light so that He can heal them. Which is why I want to encourage you to return to this exercise more than once, with an open heart. It will meet you differently each time.
I learned early, as a little girl, that it was easier not to let people in. It was easier not to rely on others so that I couldn't be hurt, to wall myself off and just rely on myself. It was safer to take care of the people around me than to be known by them. Some people call this people pleasing. I just knew it worked. If I could meet everyone else's needs, anticipate their expectations, keep everyone happy, then I felt safe. My nervous system learned to equate managing others with security. What I didn't realize was that I had begun to believe a lie: that if I took care of everyone else, I would be protected. That my worth was something I had to earn, and that being truly seen was simply too great a risk.
That way of living followed me into my relationship with God. For a long time I viewed Him the way I viewed any authority figure: as someone watching for what I did wrong, waiting to catch me. A dictator. A police officer. It made perfect sense, from that place, to stay hidden. Why would you let someone in who was only looking for reasons to condemn you?
Everything began to shift one weekend at a Freedom Movement retreat. God revealed Himself to me as a friend. Not a warden. Not a judge. A friend who simply wanted to be with me. That was huge.
I wish I could tell you that everything changed in an instant after that weekend. But the truth is that God has unpacked this slowly, moment by moment, through experiences exactly like this prayer exercise, and through community. Through ReEngage marriage ministry at our church. Through my online Confessional Community. Through sitting with others, sharing my story, and discovering that being known by safe people didn't destroy me. It healed me.
That healing is still happening. And it can happen for you too.
So if you sit with this exercise and feel fear, you are in good company. Just stay with it. Let God be the friend He has revealed Himself to be. And trust that whatever He brings to the light, He brings there to heal, not to shame.